My feathers get ruffled sometimes. Sometimes they get bent out of shape and even fall out. Other times they seem to just get smudged a bit. However they get ruffled, I don’t like the irritating feeling it brings to the surface of my thoughts.
Recently I’ve had a serious case of keeping up with the Joneses. Not in the way you think, however. I don’t feel the need to rebuild our deck, or to hire personal trainers for all of us, or get a new car because everyone else is. It’s actually been happening in the opposite direction lately. The Joneses of the world have been questioning or commenting on choices we’ve made about this and that. A sort of “aren’t you going to send your children to this school or that school?” or “why are you staying home when you could be doing x, y or z?” or “aren’t you going to the Internet safety program this week?” kind of things.
To be frank, it’s not really a concern of anyone’s but ours as to what we choose to or not to do as a family, with our time and what activities we participate in. It’s almost as if the Joneses are upset that we aren’t keeping up with them. It’s been a challenge these last few weeks for me in this area to say the least. I really try to be respectful of this when I have an opportunity to chat with my children’s parents, our friends and family and our neighbors. I don’t ever want someone to feel as if they are inadequate because they aren’t doing x, y or z and would never go out of my way to make them feel less for not doing so.
Am I being too general? Are you still with me?
I think at times, the Joneses forget that every family is different. We don’t need to attend the Internet safety program at this point because I’m sitting RIGHT there when they are on the computer and if they delete the history, then they aren’t allowed to use the computer.
Just because we don’t give blood on a regular basis, doesn’t mean we don’t care about our community. We do many things and participate in many local events to help others.
We will choose a school for both of our children that best meets their needs because WE know our children and how they learn and how they are in the school environment.
Our schedules are busy, just like the rest of yours are, and if we get a chance to be home together and play Apples to Apples and poker with cheerios, then that’s what we will do.
Our family is unique just like yours is. We just choose to be less vocal about our activities perhaps than others because that’s how we are.
Don’t get me wrong, though. I love hearing about what everyone is up to, the concerts, the volunteering, the birthdays, and the new windows going in the house. I want to hear about all of it, but I don’t want to be made to feel bad for not doing the same. That’s just not fair.
I may share certain parts of our family with the world through this blog, but I don’t share everything here or with friends and family. Some of that is for us, and for us to call our own and define who we are. I hope to never make anyone I know ever feel less of a human, parent, mother, father, friend, sister, brother, etc., because their activities are different than ours. We all want our families to be well rounded. I think that’s the common goal we lose sight of, but we must remember that everyone does it differently. Our way may not be your way, but it works for us and what doesn’t work, we work on. That’s the beauty of raising a family.
I love my family and all our quirks and talks and activities and jokes and time together. It’s our family.
