The Nine

I read many blogs throughout the week and have several favorites, one of which is Liz Lamoreux’s.  You can read her blog here.  She is a creative soul and inspires me daily with her ability to be real and true in all that she writes and presents through her photography and the beautiful jewelry she crafts.   Earlier in the fall, I had the pleasure of enrolling in her e-class called Create Space.  You can read about it here and for you creative sorts, I would highly recommend you take it the next time it’s offered.   I didn’t really know what to expect from the class, but walked away with such a refreshed energy about being true to myself. Wonderfully inspiring.

In reading her blog, I found an interview series she started with many creative people, call The Nine.   It’s simply a series of questions that are asked and responses are made through photographs or videos.  I have used her nine questions to share with you today a peek into my world as it is right now.   I love photography and am always looking for new ideas and ways to capture a story.  This time, as simple as it is, is my story through Liz Lamoreux’s The Nine questions.  This is me…in nine questions.  I hope these questions inspire you to think about yourself and the creative soul that is uniquely yours.

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1.  Who are you?

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2.  In this moment, where are you?

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3.  What are the textures of your corner of the world?

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4.  If you had an hour alone to just play, what would you do?

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5.  How do you seek joy?

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6.  What nourishes you?

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7.  When you need to simply take a breath and ground yourself, what do you do?

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8.  How do you nurture your creative dreams?

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9.  Does your heart have a secret wish you want to share?

Tidbits

I couldn’t be happier about it being Friday!  I’m ready for this week to be over.  It’s hasn’t been a bad week, don’t get me wrong, but I have felt out of sorts all week and need to start fresh with seven new days.  I have made quite a dent on some spring cleaning however and that has boosted my spirits and put my brain back on track a bit.  When you’re a type A personality like me and  can’t find your scissors or scotch tape when a girl needs them, let’s just say it’s not pretty.  

The kitchen junk drawers now deserve a new title, because they no longer fit into the “junk” category, which I know they are happy about and my loft (also known as dumping ground central for all tiny and sparkly things without a home) is now back to normal and everything in its place.   I found the new pink scissors that had gone hiding after a school project and all my Sharpie pens now have a home on my desk.  My mind has some space to breath now, so things are looking up.

I wanted to share a few little tidbits about the week and hope that you will enjoy your weekend and find some time to sip a cup of tea in peaceful quiet and watch the birds fly from branch to branch. English Breakfast is my favorite.

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My car had the hiccups this week and is feeling much better.  I’m so thankful my parents are available to help with car swapping when necessary. Such a lucky girl am I!

The sun peeking out of the dark sky yesterday.

Our oldest had his opening night in a musical and did a wonderful job. He never ceases to amaze me with what he is capable of doing.  Sang beautifully and gave me such joy to watch him.

I am truly enjoying what a little app can do for my photos.  I’ve known about InstaGram for a while and just never updated the app onto my phone, but I’m snappin’ pictures left and right and love all the options.   Here are a few I took this week. 

Nela playing my editor for the morning.

Our little guy is about to crossover and become a boy scout. His Arrow of Light ceremony is tomorrow and we’ve finished his arrow to present to him.  He makes me so proud that he’s stuck with it when many of his friends have dropped out year after year.  He’s got goals to become an eagle scout at age 13! (He found out it will lower his car insurance as a teen driver and so thinks we might get him an old Camero or Mustang to drive instead of a 1967 VW minibus.)  Gotta love it.

My husband and I have been going to the Y each evening to exercise and love that it’s become a part of our routine!  (Don’t you tell a soul I actually typed the words “love” and “exercise” in the same sentence. It’s our little secret!)

Did I tell you I cleaned out my loft?  Boy does it feel good!

We had an unexpected snow day yesterday and enjoyed being at home together.  The fireplace was on, and the boys each spent time with friends.  It was nice to have that surprise.  The boys’ “YES” and fist pumps were an added bonus to the day.

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I hope your weekend is splendid.  (That’s my word for the day. Have to use it five times.  Only three more to go.)  Enjoy and Happy Weekend a little early.

Extra Shampoo and Hangers

I’m feeling a bit, let’s just say, unorganized lately, and for an organization F.R.E.A.K. this isn’t a good place to be.  When we moved into our new house a year and a half ago, I purged box after box.  I threw away old trophies, (except the 4th grade 2nd place spelling bee trophy I won) magazines, and junk that had no place in our new home.  I had a huge garage sale of hundreds of things and what didn’t sell, went straight to the local charity donation center.  It felt so wonderful to have only what we needed go with us.

So how is it, twenty months later, I feel like it’s all come back?  I have the spring cleaning bug so badly, I’m tempted to go to the doctor and see if there is a cure.   Problem is, it feels so daunting right now, that I don’t know where to start.  Pick a room, any room and it needs some organizational tending.

The kitchen has five junk drawers and we’re not utilizing the space in our little nook very wisely.  The linen closet has sheets for beds we no longer have and no matter how many bottles of shampoo I have stored in there, I always buy a new bottle before looking in there and using up that supply first!  The laundry room needs hangers.  Hangers. That’s pretty simple don’t you think?  The boys’ rooms….well….let’s just say….they need some serious work….days worth of work.  Then there’s the garage. Sigh.  Sigh again. 

I really need a coach of sorts to just stand over me and ask all the questions that need to be asked.  “Do you really need 15 blank spiral notebooks?  How many $1 Michaels’ bin journals do you think you’ll use this year?  When was the last time you filed anything away into that green file cabinet?  Why do you have full sized sheets when you don’t have a full sized bed?” 

I know when it gets done I’ll feel light as a feather, but until then, I’m feeling the extra weight of the wrapping paper and extra sheets and the fifteen spiral notebooks on my shoulders.  I know it’s temporary and will get done, but until then, wish me luck in the motivational department.  I’m going to need it. 

A Cat Throw Up And Two Gum Wrapper Kind Of Day

I’m having one of those days.  You know the kind.  The kind where you start off by hearing the alarm clock and decide to close your eyes for three more minutes and then get up, only to realize that when you look at the clock again it’s been twenty-three minutes not three. 

It’s 11:38 AM and the bed isn’t made.  I just put the groceries away that I bought at 9:15AM.  I know!  (I dare you to say one word about it.)  Nothing melted and we won’t get food poisoning from the carrots and Oreo cookies that were sitting out. 

I feel like my head is on someone else’s body today.  I’ve bumped into the car twice getting into it this morning.  I didn’t put any socks on for the quick trips to drop the boys at school and my little toe hurts now from my cute little white Pumas. 

I tried to open the kitchen junk drawer only to be reminded that it is filled with enough junk to fill two five junk drawers and the one day old pink scissors I just bought aren’t in there when I need them.   There are 400 books of matches, three phone chargers (two for phones we no longer have!)  (If you even think of saying something now, I would warn against it.) and two gum wrappers.  Yes.  Wrappers.

The cats’ litter boxes are WAY over due to be emptied.  The fish aquarium is becoming an algae experiment and the sock basket is now upside down on the laundry room floor where the cats played chase and the socks lost.  Folks, I couldn’t make this stuff up.

The doorbell rang and as I peeked around to see who it was I stepped right into a pile of two day old cat throw up!  I am essentially still in my pajamas with a sweatshirt thrown on over them and my hair is sticking out in all directions. (Putting your hair in a ponytail in the dark doesn’t always turn out like you think it does.)

I forced myself to sit down with my computer and just spew it out so I can move on with my day at almost noon.   I’m not in a bad mood, but just feel out of sorts and don’t like it one bit.  I like order. I like neat.  I like my scissors to be in the right drawer.  I prefer the cats to throw up on the wood floor instead of the carpet.  I like to shower and be dressed for the day at 6:15 AM not 12:30 PM. 

Breathing slower now.  I hope I didn’t scare you off?   I know you’ve had one of these kind of days and am comforted when I see the other moms in the grocery store in their pajamas and their ponytails lopsided and sticking out of their hats.  I understand them.  I get it.  These days happen and life will go on and come into balance once again, even if it is at 9:45PM tonight.  Thanks for letting me calm down.  Now to carry on.

(P.S.  I did throw the two gum wrappers away.  I’ll get to the old phone chargers tomorrow.)

We Are Enough

I had only been there for about four minutes when the two machines got taken on either side of me.   They turned their machines on and quickly set their “resistance” to 6 and the “cross ramp” to 10 (not that I was peeking).  They were running on their elliptical machines as if they were on fire and trying to put the flames out.  The machines were shaking and they were huffing and puffing, brushing off the sweat from their foreheads, while I kept my slow and steady turtle pace in between them both.  (Note:  “resistance” on 2 and “cross ramp” on 1.)  

Within in a few short minutes, I began to question myself.  “Should I go faster?”  “Should I change my settings?”  The negative comparisons began to creep into my mind.   I quickly shut the thoughts down and turned my focus to the 1980’s tv that was suspended from the ceiling and watched the last 25 minutes of Good Morning America via closed caption. 

Why is it that we, especially women, tend to start that “maybe I’m not ok” negative self talk?  We doubt our strength, our determination, our own personal goals in an instant when presented with someone who is skinnier than us, has the perfect haircut, or always has the perfect manicure.   Why?

Aren’t we good enough?  Don’t we have value where we are on our own path and journey?  Don’t we need to believe in ourselves and what gifts and special talents we have to offer the world? 

We are good enough.  

I am good enough as I am.

We do have value.  

I am valuable in this world.

We do need to believe.   

I believe in myself.

I used to fall into the negative self talk hole of holes so quickly and stay there for hours, but no more.   Over the last six months or so, that negative self talk and desire to compare myself to others has faded quietly into the background.   It shows up every now and then, but I know how to recognize it and quickly turn the channel. 

Everyone has value and deserves to treat themselves accordingly.  I now say to myself, “Hey, I showed up today and exercised and that’s great for me, my mind and my body.”  I don’t have those desires to compare myself to others as often as I once did.  I am comfortable being me and know that I am just as worthy as my elliptical partners running nowhere in a hurry. 

We are enough as we are.  We don’t need to be more to be valuable.  We are valuable as we are, even if our “resistance” is on 2 and our “cross ramp” is on 1.  Even then.  We are enough.

Five Days Of Love: Day Five

Friday’s Love……….My Spouse

My husband.  My Spouse.  My Sweetheart.  My Love.  My Heart of Hearts.

We met the first time at a dinner on a cold January evening during college.  We sat next to each other and talked about this and that, but I didn’t know then, that he was going to love me and that I was going to love him.

We left the dinner and didn’t cross paths for the rest of the semester. We may have exchanged a nod at the bookstore out of recognition or a hello in the student center, but nothing of significance. 

Summer came and went.  School started again in the fall and we crossed paths again and remembered our first meeting and had one conversation.  One conversation.  I knew at the end of that conversation who he was to me.  I knew.  I instantly knew I was home and that he was going to be my husband.  It only took one conversation.  Just one to reconnect.

I had never been so certain of anything before in my life. 

We got married a year and a half later and have been happily married now for twenty-one and a half years.  That may seem like a long time, but to us, we still feel like newlyweds.

I can look into his warm brown eyes to this day and my heart flutters like I’m still that 21 year-old girl.  I love his smile, his honesty, his strength, his gentleness, his caring nature, his openness and can recognize his walk from a mile away. 

His heart is now mine and mine his and think we always belonged to each other, even before we knew each other.  At one time, we were of the same heart and sent here to reconnect and become one again.

I love my husband, my spouse, my sweetheart, my love, my heart of hearts.

Five Days Of Love: Day Four

Thursday’s Love…..Stillness

The sun isn’t quite up yet, but it’s up enough to change the darkness of the sky to a deep navy blue.   The birds are still sleeping and the wind hasn’t decided to play yet.  My family is still tucked in the covers, not ready to rub their eyes awake.

I love this time because of the stillness that is present. 

I love stillness.  Is that possible?   

I can multi-task with the best of them, but when all the i’s have been dotted and t’s crossed and there is a moment when it’s quiet and peaceful, I’m there.  Perhaps it’s my yoga of sorts.  Quiet time, alone, candle glow, peaceful breathing, warm air, sunlight on the floor, hearing only my heartbeat; stillness at its best.

I feel as if I can breath better in the quiet. I can be present in the moment when things are still. When stillness makes its way into my day, I welcome it with open arms and embrace it while I can.  I’m always appreciative of its visit.

Stillness comes to us as a gift to connect with ourselves, God, our souls, and the space around us.  We all need stillness in our day to reenergize and restart our minds and bodies, so if it comes to visit you today, invite it in for a cup of tea and sit down and relax for a bit.   It will do you more good than you know.

Five Days Of Love: Day Three

Wednesday’s Love…..My Boys

I am a mother to two young boys.  I love them.   Those three words however, do not describe the love that I feel for them. 

I knew I wanted to be a mother from an early age, probably around 15.  It was in me all along, tucked inside my heart.  There was a space for these two boys that I knew would only be filled by them.  They fill it well.

The love a mother has for her children is a love like no other. 

It’s strong, powerful.

It’s colorful, golden.

It’s deep, extensive.

It’s glorious, heavenly.

I am connected to them in a ways I can’t describe.  I feel their presence before they walk in the door.  I miss their energy when they aren’t in the house.  When they are happy, I’m thrilled.  When they are upset, I’m saddened.  I love my boys like nothing else.  It’s a love that only another mother can understand. Truly. 

Their spirits fill my life with such positive energy and feed my very inner being.  Their voices fill the room with a sing song of laughter and smiles. I am lucky to have found such love in my life and to have been graced with their lives.  They are intertwined with me through the spoken and unspoken love we share.

They knit together the heart that beats inside me and will forever be changed by their two hearts. 

I love my boys.

More than these few words can say.

photo circa 2001

Five Days Of Love: Day Two

Tuesday’s Love….Lists

I love lists. I know, this probably isn’t what you were expecting to read here today, but it’s the truth.  (I’ll get to some of the mushy love later this week.)

I am a list maker and have been for the better part of my adult life, maybe because I am a visual learner.  I process everything through my eyes first and then the rest of my senses after.   The law of the house is if you need me to do or get something for you, I must put pen to paper and make a list.  If I don’t write it down right then, it won’t get done.  Period. 

Reasons Why I Love Lists

I love the organization of a list. 

I love the shortness of a list (unless its one of “those” days).

I love that I can write a list in big black Sharpie ink if I feel like it. 

There are no rules for lists. (Well…maybe only one.) 

Lists aren’t formal.

Lists can be on anything; a receipt, a movie stub, a wrapper, a napkin, etc.

Lists are easier to read than sentences.

They look neat and tidy.

They make you look smart and organized.

I’ve made lists for things to buy, things to get done in the house, books to read, stories to tell my children, things to say, music to listen to one day, things to eat.  Name it, I’ve probably made a list for it.  

For me, having a list handy leaves no room for error.  If it’s in front of you, you can quickly refer to it, review it, add to it and tear it up when you’re through with it.  It’s simple.  I have gadgets that make lists, but when I really get serious about a subject that needs a list, I have to have ink and paper.  That connection from my head through my fingers makes it real and imprints it upon my brain better than a gadget does.  That’s just me.

There is a sense of satisfaction for me as well that comes from list making.  As each item is crossed off (and you have to cross things off - that is the only real rule) the list shrinks and a sense of accomplishment begins to rise and the thrill is found in crossing off the last item and wadding up the paper or tearing it in half signifying completion.  It’s a very rewarding feeling.  I’ve even made life decisions based on my lists before.  I really have. (Aren’t you curious?)

It’s a love I’ve had for a while now.  I’m an odd duck, what can I say?  I love lists. 

Five Days Of Love: Day One

L.O.V.E.

It’s a word that has an infinite number of definitions.  It means everything to everyone.  It’s universal and complicated.  It’s sweet and sour.  It’s an emotion that everyone knows in one form or another.  It’s simple.  It’s love.

For the next five days, I want to share five loves of mine; loves that make my life rich and full of life.  I hope you’ll join me on this little love fest this week.  It may not be all mush and sloppy kisses, but it’s love nevertheless.

Monday’s Love……..Photography

Yes, you had to know that I love taking pictures and capturing all the moments of life as it flies by. I’m not a professional photographer by any means, but I love catching a moment that brings a smile to my face or shows raw, real emotion.  You should feel something when you see a photo, shouldn’t you?

My family has gotten used to me taking photos of everything and just goes with the flow now.  They know I’m going to take the picture whether or not they like it, so they just ignore me and go on about their day.

Before I got my latest camera, everything was staged and everyone looked at the camera and said “cheese”. I try now to just snap away in hopes of capturing that emotion and feeling that’s in the room. I love when it happens and feel giddy that I “got it”. 

I’m still learning about the details of my camera and hope to improve each day and create with the way I see things through the lens.  I have so much to learn, but that’s what makes this love of mine so enjoyable. There’s always room for improvement.

So, here are some of the reasons I love photography; one of my five loves.

Snow Weekend

the snow fell for two days

it's everywhere

it's beautiful

the weekend...filled with sledding, naps, football and laughter

love a snow weekend

enjoy yours

Three Cheers For February

Love is in the air.  Move over January and make way for your friend, February.  Can you believe it’s already February?  I love this month.   It’s short.  It’s sweet.  It’s lovely. 

It has a fragrance about it that is all warm and fuzzy and makes you want to smile and blow kisses to everyone.  Ok, so maybe that’s just me. (For the record, I don’t blow kisses to everyone I see, but I just might.)  I like a month dedicated to all things pink, red, chocolatey, and sweet smelling.   It puts a little bounce in my step to hear that February is upon us and actually gets to stick around for a day longer than last year. 

Three cheers for February! Hip Hip Hooray!  Hip Hip Horray!  Hip Hip Horray!

With it being the first day of a new month, it gives us that permission once again to set some goals, strive for something better, improve ourselves, focus on what’s really important to us.  It’s a fresh beginning one more time.

This month I hope to…

Love my family more than January

Inspire those I come in contact with to be true to themselves

Write more

Slow down and enjoy all that is before me

Appreciate the love I receive

Be the kind of friend my friends really need and want

Try something new

Fly

Reach out to those who are far away from me

Bake something sweet and delicious for my family

Embrace my boys with softness

Continue to take care of my mind, body and soul

Be open to change

Take time today, this first day of February, and jot down your thoughts, ideas, and what you hope to see for yourself this month.  It’s ok to spend a few minutes and not make the beds or fold the laundry or wash the car.   Think.  Ponder.  Wonder.  What will this month bring?  I’d love to hear what you have planned.  Feel free to leave me a note.  I love getting notes in February!  Hip Hip Horray!  Three cheers for February.