Not My Average Thursday

Today was just supposed to be a normal Thursday, but something happened inside me that changed that.  I was returning a book (that I didn't read) to the library, when I decided to see if there were any books on "How to Write a Book".  It's been tugging at my heart for a while now so I thought I'd see if there was something that would inspire me.  Actually, I was hoping there would be one just screaming my name, because deep inside my heart of hearts, I think I would like to write.  What? I don't know. But do know that writing brings a joy to my life and a sense of peace to my soul.  Yeah, that sounds deep and all, but it's true.  There's something about it that makes my heart pound loud enough for the car beside me to hear it.  Really.  I'm not joking.  

As I walked to the 800.20 shelf, my feet weren't my feet any longer.  I felt I was being pulled by a rope to the shelf and as God is my witness (and I'm convinced, was probably the one pulling the rope) I walked straight to the shelf where these books were.  Keep in mind, I am a fiction reader and not big on non-fiction, so am unfamiliar with this section of my library.  Somehow though, my feet stopped right in front of the shelf.  Tears came to my eyes for a second - out of nowhere.  What was I feeling? Tears?  These are just books.  Why the sudden urge to have wet eyes? I've been a bit emotional some days, but I was feeling just fine when I walked in there. It hadn't hit me yet.  I began pulling books off the shelf and ended up with an armful of six selected titles. One was titled "A Guide to Greeting Card Writing" and was published in 1979. I'm sure things have changed since then, but it sounded interesting.  Plus, it probably hadn't been checked out in years! I felt sorry for it.  I checked all six out and then headed to my car.  When I set them in the seat, the tears came again. My left ring finger's middle knuckle started to throb and hurt.  This was my sign.  It always happens when I experience deep emotions or feelings.  Not the kind you get watching an uplifting or emotional movie, but true, deep, raw feelings.  

Then it dawned on me.  Maybe this is what I'm supposed to do.  Maybe I can write something meaningful, enjoyable, real.   I smiled so big the whole way home.  I needed to write.  Right then.  I got home and decided to just "do" rather than plan it out and make a list like I always do.   I would start a blog.  All the signs were there, but I just didn't have my eyes open wide enough to see them.  Our neighbors, who recently moved, started one and I loved reading it. I have been writing some "wish lists" online and people have enjoyed reading them. I've recently had several friends tell me I should write.  A friend recently wrote a note on her FaceBook page about living now and finding your passion and engaging in life.  I had just read an article in one of my magazines I subscribe to about a woman who blogged for a living. However, I read the article in the magazine my mom gave me (we subscribe to the same one) and must not have seen it when I received my copy.  (So that sign actually counts twice since I didn't get it the first go 'round.)  It was right there in front of me, but somehow the timing just wasn't quite right until today.  Thursday, January 21, 2010.  

So instead of thinking, I'm "doing".  No plan.  I will write this blog and see where it leads.  It's a road that I am very anxious to travel.  How will this bring joy to our lives? How will I know what to write about?  Will someone enjoy what I write?   What will I learn about myself? We shall see.  This is my story........this is my song.  The song of my heart and my journey.  I can hardly wait to see where the road goes.