No U-turns for Me this Week

The past few weeks have been overwhelmingly filled with activities, travel, joy and frustration, new experiences and let’s throw in a little dash of stress for kicks.  I won’t list all of the events that have taken place around us, there’s no need, but as I look back over the events of last month, a common thread has tied them all together and has presented itself to me over and over again.  Perhaps it’s a lesson I refuse to learn or a quality I so admire that I keep bumping into it to remind me of its importance in life.  Patience.

As many of you know, patience is not my strong suit.  I always joke that when God was passing out patience, I stood in line with a strainer and most of it ended up on the floor.  (Now, when I stood in line for Organization, I had a steel bucket and was first in line.) Being patient does not come easy for me like it does my dad.  He can sit and be quiet and wait for hours and never complain.  Never.

photo credit

If we are patient, then God has time to work and lay out the road before us and lead us where we need to go.  If we rush, we miss the signs, we miss the turn in the road creating a whole other series of events for ouselves.  You have to make a u-turn, possibly ask for directions, fill up with gas and hope there is another on-ramp to the road you were supposed to be on. We create problems for ourselves by not being patient and thinking we know best.

If we are patient, we may still have the struggles that come in life, but the solutions are easier to see, to feel, to hear.  When we slow down and listen, are consciously patient, we see the flowers that grow beside the stop sign we quickly run through. We can feel the warmth of the sun on our backs when we are tired from the day. We can hear our favorite song playing in the restaurant behind all the chatter and forks clanking.  Being patient requires effort on our part to see things differently, to see what God sees in us and our lives.

We live in a world of instant gratification, instant messages, instant downloads, instant coffee, instant everything.  It’s easy, but is easy always better? I don’t think so.  This week I will be patient and listen and then listen some more.  I will learn this lesson and appreciate all Patience has to offer and try my best not to make any u-turns.

Silvia and CeCe

I know I’m not alone.  We’ve all been there.  Standing in line waiting our turn to pay for the groceries, scanning the 38 types of gum, when it hits you smack in the face.  The woman (it’s never a man) in front of you is “one of those” people.  You take a deep breath and try to remain calm. 

I am ALWAYS behind her in line.  Let’s call her Silvia.  You see, Silvia is not like other people. She is a lost soul and never has to be anywhere but where she is at that moment. She doesn’t have to pick anyone up from school (and obviously doesn’t care that you do).

Just the other day I was standing in line at the store behind “Silvia” thumbing through the magazines at the checkout stand when I heard her say, “The tomatoes are on sale.  They aren’t $2.99 a pound, they are $2.97 a pound.”  I try to ignore what I’ve just heard, but I know I’m in for it now.  There’s no turning back.  I’ve already unloaded my cart onto the conveyor belt.  “Ma’am, the sale ended yesterday on all our produce.”  Silvia tells the clerk, “The sign says they are $2.97 per pound and I want them for that price. That’s why I came in today.”  I look at the scale holding the tomatoes.  She has two.  TWO.  If they were on sale and that’s why she came, then why is she buying only two?  For heaven’s sake lady, buy the whole lot of them!

Or, how about Silvia’s younger sister, CeCe? CeCe is talking on her cell phone, rummaging through her purse looking for her checkbook or her credit card or who knows what.  Her three-year-old daughter, who is in desperate need of a nose wiping, is crying because her baby doll’s head is stuck in the rungs of the cart and she can’t get her out. CeCe sees the doll, but ignores it. CeCe’s purse then falls to the floor, knocking her daughter in the head.  Pennies and dimes are rolling across the floor and the crying has now escalated to a new level called screaming.  The cashier has just turned on her register’s blinking light (this should be the universal symbol telling everyone in line behind her to run - but no - it means she’s out of register tape! Oh joy!) And yet, CeCe is still talking on the phone to her girlfriend about the movie they are going to see next Friday and asking if she should wear the new purple dress that’s really low cut or her cut off jean shorts with that cute yellow top with the ruffles on it.  Really?

I can’t help but roll my eyes at her and say to myself, “You are unbelievable, woman.” I know these types exist, but to see them in action never ceases to amaze me.  I am very choosy when it comes to picking my line at most any store.  I’m always on the lookout for Silvia and CeCe in the checkout lane and try to stay as far away from them as possible, but there are days when my “crazy lady” radar is on the fritz. It’s on those days that I try and remind myself that the world is made up of all types.  I just hope I’m not THAT type.  

47 hours, 46 minutes and Counting

Sitting on the fence is no easy task for me.  On one side is pure excitement and joy and on the other is uncertainty and lack of control.  I’ve been sitting on this fence now for almost a week and have about 48 more hours to go. It’s truly been a test of my patience to say the least.  However, today I am planning to relax and accept the flow of the day.  I so often say to others, “You can only do what you can do,” and I have done all that I can do. Now, I must sit and wait, be quiet, listen and show a kind of patience I don’t normally have.  I have no other choice.  It doesn’t mean the next 47 hours and 58 minutes will be simple and without emotion, but I am doing my best to let go and give my worries to God and let him handle it from here.   Why spend valuable energy worrying about things I cannot change or have control over?   What a waste of time, right?  Of course it is, but my mind has trouble accepting that truth and my heart wants so strongly.  How to balance the two is the issue I face today. 

I will rest in the fact that a few simple God winks have come our way in the last few days, so am holding onto those and keeping them close to my heart.  I have lived my life believing that everything happens for a reason, so will continue with that mantra today and enjoy the sun that has been absent for so many days, enjoy my son being off from school today and getting his braces off, and having lunch with my husband.   Today will be a good day, I just know it.