Roughin' It

I am the mom of a Webelo this year.  You know what that means, don’t you? It means we have the pleasure of going camping, twice this year. (Did you notice I used the words pleasure and camping in the same sentence?  I’m trying to be positive about this.) For those of you who know me, I’m not much of a “roughin’ it” type.  I’m not above doing it. It’s just not on my top one hundred ten list of things I enjoy. 

I prefer this type of camping.

 

 Not so sure about this type of camping.

 

I’ve only slept under the stars one time and it was in our fenced in back yard a few years ago.   Not a horrible experience, but I did have access to running water and the bathroom 15 steps away if I needed it.  For the camping event this weekend, we’ll be going to a Boy Scout camp in the mountains complete with bugs, snakes and the occasional bear (although they swear they haven’t had one in a long time). Plus, in our neck of the woods, fall has arrived and the weather isn’t 95º during the day and 75º at night. It’s more like highs in the mid 70s and lows in the 40s.   (Note to self.  Don’t forget to pack extra socks and a scarf.  Ugh. What am I getting myself into?)

I know that once we get there, it will be a great experience for us and that we’ll have a good time hiking, geocaching, fishing and roasting marshmallows around the fire.  I just need to keep reminding myself that I’m doing this for my son.  His enjoyment. His happiness. His sense of accomplishment.  We’ll set up the tent, blow up the air mattress (that I borrowed from our good friends who have all things camping), help set up the rest of camp and have a great time with the other scouts and parents earning belt loops, pins, and badges along the way. 

And, who knows, maybe I’ll learn the name of some new constellations, watch a falling star, enjoy a ghost story or two and earn my “roughin it” belt loop.  I will earn a belt loop, right?  

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But My Actions Don't Show It

I’ve started this post three times over the last ten days and keep deleting it.  I don’t know why.  Perhaps my guilt has finally caught up with me and I need to get it out of the way!

I do not recycle.

I do not clip coupons.

I waste water.

There, I said it.  Now why don’t I feel better?  These three things have been weighing (4th grade spelling word this week) heavily on my shoulders and I think it’s because I’m supposed to be doing something rather than just letting the thought wander into my head and then quickly drift out again.

Let’s start with the first one, RECYCLING.

I throw away a lot of trash.  Too much if you ask me.  I throw cardboard, plastic, paper, aluminum and the list goes on and on.   I’m lazy, I guess.  Having so many different containers to put the trash in, just isn’t my idea of neat and tidy.  I don’t want to bother taking an extra step to mess with trash.  I have so many things on my “to do” list that adding one more to it will require me to carry around a ream of paper tucked under my arm.  Not real convenient!  But, those are all excuses.   I’m smart enough to know that I’m contributing to the landfill problems of the world and the last thing I want is some poor dolphin to eat my Starbucks cup and die.  I care about the dolphins.  Really, I do, but my actions don’t show it.  

Let’s take a look at the second one, COUPONS.

I come across 30-40 coupons a week and just flip on by them and go on to the next page in my magazine or flyer as if saving $1 wasn’t good enough for me.  The convenience of it is my excuse once again.  You have to find the scissors (which in my house can be a day long event) cut it out, find a place to keep it AND most importantly have to remember to take it with you to the store and actually use it.   Too many steps. But, those are all excuses. I know that 15 coupons at $.75 each is $11.25 in my pocket.  That’s two new pair of soccer socks, or lunch with a friend, or two bargain books off the Under $4.95 table at Barnes and Noble.  Why isn’t this important enough for me to take action?  I care about money.  Really, I do, but my actions don’t show it.

Let’s take a look at the final item, WATER.

I like my water.  I water our yard, I drink it, I cook with it and indulge myself by taking a bath almost every night.  I leave the faucet on when I brush my teeth and when I’m rinsing dishes and run my dishwasher when it’s not all the way full.  Shame on me, I know.  How could I when there are truly children who don’t have water to drink?  That one tugs at my heart knowing I’m not helping conserve this precious resource that I am so privileged to have at the tap of a finger.  I should be more careful.  I care about our world.  Really, I do, but my actions don’t show it.

I think it just comes down to being completely lazy.   It’s an ugly word to use to describe myself, but as the saying goes, “If the shoe fits, wear it.”  I need to make some changes.  I need to make a phone call to my local trash company and find out about their recycling program. I need to buy the Sunday paper and create a “coupon station” in the kitchen to keep and store them in.  I need to shorten our sprinkler system cycle times, turn off the water when I brush my teeth and cut my bathing down to once a week (ok, so maybe just showering instead would be good enough).  I am an intelligent woman, but my actions don’t show it.   By this time tomorrow, I will be a “green”, coupon-clippin’, water-conservin’ team member of the world and my actions will show it. Just you wait.

Date Night

It was Saturday night and everyone was in bed after a busy day of umpiring, chauffeuring, cooking, a baseball game, dining with family, entertaining guests and my husband and I decide to (pause, wait for it) do algebra in bed.  Yep, that’s right.  You heard me right.   At 10:35PM everyone was asleep and listening to their radios when I snuck back into my son’s room and grabbed his homework to take a look at the two problems he was stuck on.  I’m a college graduate. I know how to add and subtract. I understand the standard order of operations rule. I wasn’t about to let little x’s and y’s take me down without a fight.  

I tossed the worksheet and his “study guide” onto the bed and took a quick bath, dabbed on some perfume and told my husband that there were two problems our 8th grader was stuck on and wanted to see if I could help him out.   Before I knew it, we were both sitting in bed with the worksheet in between us grabbing pencils and paper trying to figure out how to write a system of equations with two variables from a word problem. 

We each took the same approach and tried our hand at solving it alone, each in our little space of the bed (secretly trying to outsmart each other by coming up with the solution first).   We knew what the answers were, but to write them in an algebraic expression using two variables was a different story.  No easy task when you haven’t done algebra in thirty-some odd years.

We laughed and talked about it, erased and started over a few times.  Laughed some more.  Discussed the high expectations of eighth grade these days, reminisced about our school days and laughed some more. Finally, with neither of us solving it on our own, we googled the term “system of equations” and within 45 seconds, we had our answer.  (A special thanks and shout-out to our good friends Larry Page and Sergey Brin - the founders of Google.  We love you guys.)

It wasn’t dinner and a movie (and making popcorn next time might not be a bad idea), but we had a good time and in the end, we finished the problems. (And, for the record, I don’t think it officially counts as doing your child’s homework because he didn’t ask us to do it.  So, I think we’re off the hook in that regard.)  For us, it wasn’t about picking a movie or a restaurant, it was just simply hanging out together, laughing and enjoying a modern date night, the algebra way!  

The Positive Side of the Number Line

I think as a mother of two remarkable boy wonders and a wife to a wonderful, loving man, I have a pretty good job.  I don’t really have any complaints as such. When I hear other women’s comments about being a stay at home mom, they tend to be heavy on the negative side of the number line rather than the positive side.  They complain about not having enough time to relax or read a book and that the house is always a mess because the kids don’t put away their toys.  Hearing these things makes my ears burn.

I do the laundry, cook dinner, buy the groceries, clean the bathrooms, empty the cat litter boxes, mow the lawn, attend every soccer and baseball practice and game, take kids to school and pick them up, go to the gym (not happily I might add) and somehow still have time to go to coffee with friends, shop with my Mom and most definitely read.  Maybe I’m just more organized?  Maybe I just like to be busy?   Maybe I just like my job?

When I hear these women talk, I always think to myself, “Hmm.  They didn’t go to the same Mother/Wife school that I did.” (Now, don’t get me wrong, I am by no means claiming to have this position completely figured out and have the golden key to parenting and all things wifely.  I don’t.)  I went to the school that taught me to believe that if you pick a profession that you love, then life will be fulfilling and the rewards that come to you will be great. I honestly think that some of these ladies must have skipped class and just worked on their tans.

My biggest pet peeve is when I hear a stay at home mom/wife complain that the “pay” is terrible, they never get a day off and the benefits are questionable.  I don’t seem to have that problem.  I am paid every day.  I get hugs, kisses, love and a lovely assortment of “Mom, where are my baseball socks? Where are my shin guards? Honey, thanks for ironing my shirt” type of comments that make me feel loved and needed. I take the day off when I need to and have time to myself if I need it.  And, my benefits allow me to be home to greet my boys every day and to get that first reaction to whatever happened at school that day. I get to eat dinner with my husband on the deck and share our days and learn about the latest field hockey news.

I signed up for this position willingly and without reservation. Were these other women forced into their positions?  Makes me wonder, that’s for sure. I love my job and all the long hours.  It’s rewarding in so many ways.   I hope that when you talk to me, you'll always know that I stand on the positive side of the number line.  Always.  I'm grateful for this position and love my job.

Auspicious Symbols

Remember the book I told you about, The Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin?  It’s become more of a textbook for me lately and really gives me food for thought on being happy. One of the ideas she discusses is how Buddhism has eight auspicious symbols to represent the teachings of Buddha and reaching enlightenment. When I think about my life, I’ve acquired symbols that represent me without even knowing it.  So I wanted to share my own list of auspicious (yes, I’ve used that word twice already, but it’s a beautiful word) symbols and what they mean to me.  I’ve always known these things were important to me, but never thought much of it until I did this exercise and put them down in writing.   I hope it will inspire you to think of what represents you and your life and to surround yourself with them to inspire and encourage you on your road to finding happiness in your life. 

Stephani’s Eight Auspicious Symbols of Life

Rain

Rain washes away the old and freshens everything around us.  To remind me that we have many opportunities to start again and begin something new.           

Heart Shaped Rocks

Love is everywhere and in all things, even a rock.  To remind me that love is always there and you just have to keep your eyes open to see it.

Books

Knowledge, hope, inspiration and guidance are there and available at any moment in books.  To remind me that we are never too old to learn something new or to feed our souls with information.

Pears

The color inspires me to be who I am.  To remind me that I am unique.  Just like the Pantone color 578.

A New Notebook and Pencil

Each day is a clean sheet waiting for the writing/creativity to be placed upon it.

To remind me of all the possibilities in the world.

A Bird

Even the smallest of creatures bring joy to the space around us.  To remind me that the little things matter.

Pearls

Nature is an amazing place to just “be”. God has created so many wonders for us to enjoy.  To remind me of all things natural and gracefully put upon this earth.

A Tree

A tree is strong and supported by its roots.  To remind me that you can do anything you want with the love and support of your family and friends around you.

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